China's Got Talent?

Okay so I'll admit, if I really was so sceptical, I wouldn't for the life of me have watched yet another episode and be here to rant. But since I watched it, just like probably millions of others worldwide, I'd wager some of my thoughts probably find sympathy elsewhere too. So here goes.

From the country that produced such stunning visual entertainment as was seen in the Beijing Olympics 2008, 'China's Got Talent' has been nothing but a disappointment. From day one, performer 'Cai Hua Da Ma' had been hailed the Susan Boyle of China, tagged for the finals stage where she could pit her wonderful voice against the British wonder. Cai Hua Da Ma's voice is undoubtedly stunning, and her performance did blow me off my couch for a bit. But surely even that does not warrant the comment made by judge Zhou Libo. Starting with what seemed like high praise, reminding the audience of how Cai Hua Da Ma's great honour would be to stand on the same stage as Boyle, Zhou's comment quickly turned nothing short of derogatory when he said that it would in fact be Susan Boyle's great honour to stand on the same stage as Cai Hua Da Ma. Said in the exact same breath, with loud gestures seeking to garner the approval of the audience, right in front of the specially invited British guest, the judge's attempt to create an impactful twist on the words was plain insensitive. Surely this level of pompousness just to prove China's talent was highly uncalled for. Seriously, so what if China didn't have a Susan Boyle wannabe? Isn't the world today about being different and innovative?

Well, innovative the talent show clearly was, with an indoor venue that had a stage with a leaking ceiling. Or was the open-air stage meant to be that way? I mean, it sure seemed strange that the rain was only falling on the very spot where show-starters 'Kung Fu Pai' were trying but failing to show off their kung fu moves. Having watched the previous episode of the talent show, these kung fu lads really showed off what they got, flying and kicking and bringing the house down. So imagine the disappointment when they failed to perform on stage today, all because of a stupid, leaking ceiling. Not one of them avoided slipping or losing their balance, even after performing the most simple of moves like taking a small step forward. The stage was so obviously ill-prepared to host a performance like theirs, that Zhou Libo had to commend their courage in continuing the show. Too bad he didn't have the decency, nor the discretion, and certainly not the courage, to give them a 'yes' to allow them to progress to the next stage of the competition. Trust fellow judge (I forgot his name and I don't think he deserves my time in checking that out) to comment that they should have been prepared for bad weather. Seriously? How is an act based on kicks, jumps and other fast-paced body movements supposed to take the weather into account? Custom-make a humongous non-slip bath mat for that little circle on stage?

Following from that, what if the next performer that performed with fire had been caught in that rain? What would he have been supposed to do to pre-empt the weather? Prepare a crowd-wowing dance that would have worked with two sticks that wouldn't catch fire? And what of the performer who did breakdancing? Limit his movements to popping on the spot? It seemed Cai Hua Da Ma's performance was the only one that wouldn't have been greatly affected by the rain. Ah yes, she was supposed to be China's proud response to the European world, remember?

The judges' horribly warped sense of logic and judgment sent such a bright, young and talented group of men off the stage in minutes, that I can't shake off this sneaking suspicion. Perhaps, the decision to take the group out HADN'T in fact been made in minutes. It had been decided upon much, much earlier on, and the rain just gave the judges an easy excuse to put the kungfu group down. Maybe, the leaking ceiling was all part of this evil, orchestrated plan. Even this line of reasoning sounds more logical than (judge-whose-name-I-can't-remember)'s logic, or rather, lack thereof.

Speaking about their sense of logic and judgment, never have I seen judges as partial as those on this panel. The little boy Wu Da Mu with a voice that only suited one song has made a grand re-appearance on the finals stage after being kicked out the last time round. And what was he singing? The exact same song that got him through the first preliminary round. I think his sad life story had a part to play in getting him that far. Just like the sad life story of the girl whose husband was way less academically qualified than her. She made it to the semi-finals, but during that show, it seemed the wares her husband had brought to provide a demonstration of his everyday hawker life drew more attention than the wife's song performance. It probably drew the show higher viewership too.

Not to mention the countless times that the female judge (sorry, name not worth remembering either) has probed into the private lives of performers that were not slated to make it through the preliminaries anyway, digging for a story or two that would jerk some tears (usually, those tears would be hers). And there would always be some life-changing moral behind every sad story. Here I must make an essential disclaimer that I am not at all some uncaring, snobbish brat who cares not for the poor, innocent and needy of this world. But surely, there must be a better platform for bringing the plights of these people into the public awareness? What kind of credible talent show gets itself tied up with tear-jerking, compassion-milking mediocre-or-less performances?

This is a show that needs serious reform. And I have an idea on where it can start. China's Got Talent should really be changed to China's Got Morals. Oh wait, hold on a second. They didn't seem very high on that when they voted Kung Fu Pai off the stage. Hmm.